My 2009 Challenges

Reflection on 2008: God cleaned house! 1/1/08 marked a changing point in my life as I realized how I had been living was holding me back from God’s best. I took chances, relied on God and moved (physically and spiritually) when he spoke to me. In reality, this past year may have only been 365 days but I have been through more than what most people face in decades of their lives. The best part is I survived and God brought me through. Scripture became alive to me through all my tough times…tough doesn’t seem like the best word, maybe devastating, disastrous, debilitating…you get my point…it was REALLY, REALLY bad!!!!

I felt like Job at times because up to the beginning of 2008 I had always lived in a safety net with God. I had been challenged but felt tested within my “comfort” zone. 2008 threw up all over me with relationships, faith, health, finances and lots of other issues. I also battled a past that has haunted me for 24 years. I could no longer run…see God was answering a prayer I have been praying about for years….”God I want to live in your will for my life” I had to give up my life to live for him and he needed to clean up the garbage in my life to get me to a better place.

In 2009, I will allow God to keep “cleaning” out my closet as seasons change and the time comes to let go of the old to make room for the new. Life is a journey not a destination and the path can change; I must be open to it and trust God.

I felt like Ruth at times because I walked away from my family, old friends and old surroundings. I moved to Florida 3 ½ years ago after years of praying asking God to show me what he wanted me to do with my life. I didn’t even know God but I still prayed. I moved here and met him for the first time over 2 ½ years ago. My life has NEVER been the same. I sacrificed being with my family to be in Florida in hopes of a better life. Over the past couple years God has been doing a work in me and a couple months ago I had to make a decision to walk away from some important relationships in my life. This decision was not an easy one at all; I thought it was going to kill me because I care about these people so much. I have become stronger and realize that God saves people not me. He uses me but I can only do what he wants, he makes the breakthroughs…I am just a piece in the process – it’s his plan!

During this time, I have changed my thinking and realized with all the testing, cleaning out the old for the new to come in that I have had to patiently wait to hear from God. This offered me two challenges – patience and listening. I get so busy sometimes and like to know everything now because I am a planner, which in turn makes it hard to slow down.

In 2009, I will give God more time and myself to work on having peace by spending time with him and myself.

I have felt like Mary – I want to live with a servant’s heart. I have questioned the work being done in my life but ultimately have trusted God because he is in control. I have received MANY prophetic words about the calling I have on my life. I know these people are speaking God’s word because I have seen the visions before they gave me these words. I love how God can use absolute strangers to speak into your life to give you confirmation.

In 2009, I have to watch that I don’t “box” God in and settle for anything less than his best. Sometimes my flesh and the devil’s lies tell me that I can’t do certain things. However, scripture tells me differently…I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I will wait on God’s timing and discern the spiritual environment while waiting for his move.

The most important scripture that came alive to me was the persecution and crucifixion of Jesus. I love Jesus with all my heart and soul. I strive daily to be Christ like and it is hard sometimes because this world is rough. This year I was persecuted, judged, condemned, lied about and to, hurt, battered and bruised with words and actions, every angle of my life was attacked along with my name, who I am, my Christian beliefs and faith…no area was safe. During the months of this “beating” I clung to the cross and felt the heart of my Savior. Oddly through all this pain I feel honored that Jesus allowed me to be so close to him even though I know this is the hardest thing I have been through in my life.

That was the past…now for my challenges in 2009

-I am planning to enter a triathlon in 2010 so this year is the year to finish losing the weight I want and train. I lost 30 plus pounds in 2008 which was a great start. I plan to try new activities that have always intrigued me but I let fear hold me back. I will continue to walk, bike ride, rollerblade and swim. I want to rock climb (indoors at first), hike, kayak, snow board, boxing and attempt to surf and anything else that comes my way.

-I plan to have more God time and more me time. I give so much to others that I forget about myself. I won’t feel guilty when I take “me” time this year.

-I want to keep tapping into my artsy side. I’m not good at painting or drawing but love it. My favorite passion is poetry. I am even working on a book (not a goal for this year – God hasn’t shown me when this will happen yet, he has only told me to prepare).

-I will continue to build my ministries and move according to God’s will.

-I will spend more time enjoying life and building my friendships that God has blessed me with over the past couple of months. All these people have been lifesavers to me and will never know how dear they are to me!!!

-As the year changes so will my challenges, I will keep an open heart and mind.

My Motto for 2009: Live hard, play hard, and relax hard while living life to its fullest.

I want to grow physically and spiritually fit in 2009.